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COMPUTER - HARDWARE - page 1
Computers in Movies
Have you noticed anything weird about computers when they appear in movies? Have a look and you will remember seeing most of them in a movie.
  • 1. Word processors never display a cursor.
  • 2. You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences.
  • 3. All monitors display inch-high letters.
  • 4. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, will have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces.
  • 5. Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.
  • 6. Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.
  • 7. Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." (See "Fortress")
  • 8. All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.
  • 9. Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer.
  • 10. All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward.
  • 11. People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.
  • 12. A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.
  • 13. Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function. (See "Demolition Man" and countless others)
  • 14. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. Movie modems transmit data at a speed of two gigabytes per second.
  • 15. When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building.
  • 16. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen. (e.g., "Clear and Present Danger")
  • 17. If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it.
  • 18. No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all computer platforms.
  • 19. The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has ("Aliens"). However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't labeled.
  • 20. Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability.
  • 21. Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY Y-MP.
  • 22. Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face. (See "Alien," "2001")
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